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Restoring relationships, one gray area at a time.

I'm Anxious, You're Avoidant, Now What? February Class I'm Anxious, You're Avoidant, Now What? February Class
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I'm Anxious, You're Avoidant, Now What? February Class
$200.00

“I’m anxious, you’re avoidant, now what?”

Over four weeks, this interactive class guides couples and individuals through understanding and managing mismatched attachment styles in romantic relationships, combining neuroscience-backed teaching with practical communication tools and in-session exercises; each week focuses on a core pillar and participants leave with the confidence to move from repeating old cycles to choosing connection, even in the grey areas.

Class Schedule: Thursdays 2/5, 2/12, 2/19, 2/26

Time: 10:00-11:15am CT

Location: Zoom

Classes will be recorded. You will be sent a waiver to sign and return prior to class.

25 seats

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BEND Collection

Discover the latest additions to our collection—handpicked pieces that bring new energy to your space.

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BEND Guide for Emotional Regulation
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BEND Guide for Emotional Regulation
BEND Fridge Notepad BEND Fridge Notepad
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BEND Fridge Notepad
BEND Notepad BEND Notepad
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BEND Notepad
BEND Hardcover Journal BEND Hardcover Journal
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BEND Hardcover Journal

Meet Kate Gray, LMFT

A woman with brown hair smiling at a microphone in front of her, in a room with a white wall and a black chair, with a television screen in the background displaying a graphic that says 'Episode 25, Class with Kate, with Kate Gray, LMFT'.

“Codependency Kate” — Codependency Therapist, Relationship Specialist & Creator of the BEND Method™

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  • "Of all the money I spent in therapy to never be taught anything actually useful. Thank you so much for teaching us what to do and giving us real world tools we can understand and use."

  • "This is Kate, also known as the GOAT of therapy"

  • "As an estranged daughter AND a parent, this was extraordinarily helpful. It explains exactly how my estrangement was inevitable based on my parents parenting and understanding my role now as a parent evolves."

  • "This is a gift. Thank you for breaking this down"

  • "Great explanation, you are so helpful and passionate"

  • "BEND has changed my life the last 6 months. I wasn't sure if it was hormone replacement therapy or you .... and I'm gonna say it's you. This has helped me more than anything after a lifetime of therapy"

  • "You are a stellar educator! Thank you so much!"

  • "As a fellow therapist, I just came here to write to you that I so deeply enjoy your videos, and clear love for this work. It really gives me life"

  • "My show is on!"

  • "You are out here doing the lords work with this whiteboard and your message🙌."

  • "You are brilliant! Just explained to me why my marriage and attempt to connect with my ex husband never worked and how I became the villain in the eyes of his mother and sister"

  • "I've appreciated your content for so long now. I love how vulnerable and adaptable youve been and how honest about how this process has been for you. I think you're only improving and you've helped me so much"

  • "You're awesome. And you've broke through information that has never been expressed."

  • "Your BEND method had improved my parenting & validation skills time after time. I've been doing it for 20 years and it's levelled me up so much!"

  • "Thank you for sharing actual tools . We know what the problem is, don't want to dwell in the past. You're actually giving us mom's tools"

  • ""If you acknowledge the fire downstairs the smoke will clear up here" that resonated in my SOUL I'm so happy you came across my fyp"

  • "Thank you so much Kate! Your account has given me so many tools to be a better parent for my kids. I have been going through a grieving process since becoming a mother over the way I was parented."

  • "This is what new moms should be learning, wish I had this 18 years ago"

  • "THIS is the video I've been looking for! I'm going to write this down and put it on my fridge! I love how put this so matter-of-fact and literal. It's such a big help!"

  • "I have not been afraid to criticize your content so I will not hold back on your brilliance. This is very good and very logical. Very useful !!"

  • "I just want to say thank you for these videos-some from September helped me conceptualize things my therapist was helping me thorugh and it all clicked. I talked about your videos with her this morning and she was cheering me on! I am on my way to tackling this in my life and I thank you!"

  • "You're the only parenting teacher I watch!"

  • "The 'to you' mantra in my head helped significantly this week. Also, recognizing the different parts of BEND. Sussing out why my partner was acting a certain way and what emotion he was feeling and why"

  • ""...my partner and I were joking a bit that we should tell each other to "go get bent" (BEND method) when we notice things escalating"

  • "Win: Taught my husband AND my kids the BEND method. Even wrote it on the big ole white board. ;)"

  • "“This is literally the best sh*t I’ve ever seen on social media. Like for real for real. You’re giving concrete steps on what to do when you feel like you’re in a crisis.”

  • "Love this content! Parenting 101 is so needed"

In The News……

Exciting breakthroughs, noteworthy research, and important social sciences advancements.

Review of the Youth Justice System in England and Wales

Published: December 2016

By Charlie Taylor

Parenting strategies are shifting as neuroscience brings the developing brain into clearer focus

Published: August 21, 2025 8:35am EDT

Nancy L. Weaver

Professor of Behavioral Science, Saint Louis University

Digital illustration of a human brain made up of glowing interconnected points and lines, with a colorful, blurred abstract background.

The Effect of Spanking on the Brain

Posted: April 13, 2021 by Jill Anderson

Harvard Graduate School of Education

A young boy with brown hair and blue eyes looks out from behind a wooden railing, with a sad or worried expression on his face.

Kate’s Calendar

Keep track of Kate’s livestreams, new podcast episodes, speaking events, and classes.

January - Estrangement

February - Marriage/Partnership

March - Parenting

Monthly Content Themes

Want to share your story and be a guest on Kate’s podcast?

Click here to book your spot on Class with Kate
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Check the blog.

To The Book List
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To The Blog
Featured
How to Self Regulate
BEND, blog, parenting, trauma, behavior, needs, emotions, desires, emotional forecasting
How to Self Regulate
BEND, blog, parenting, trauma, behavior, needs, emotions, desires, emotional forecasting
BEND, blog, parenting, trauma, behavior, needs, emotions, desires, emotional forecasting
Parenting strategies are shifting as neuroscience brings the developing brain into clearer focus
neuroscience, the conversation, parenting, blog, neurobiology, rewards, punishment, nervous system, discipline, behavioral science, behavior
Parenting strategies are shifting as neuroscience brings the developing brain into clearer focus
neuroscience, the conversation, parenting, blog, neurobiology, rewards, punishment, nervous system, discipline, behavioral science, behavior
neuroscience, the conversation, parenting, blog, neurobiology, rewards, punishment, nervous system, discipline, behavioral science, behavior
Recommended Reading & Resources
blog, resources, books, podcast, show, coaches, social media, al-anon, nar-anon, al anon, nar anon, ACEs, trauma, spirituality, deconstruction, self, marriage, family systems, reparenting, Christian
Recommended Reading & Resources
blog, resources, books, podcast, show, coaches, social media, al-anon, nar-anon, al anon, nar anon, ACEs, trauma, spirituality, deconstruction, self, marriage, family systems, reparenting, Christian
blog, resources, books, podcast, show, coaches, social media, al-anon, nar-anon, al anon, nar anon, ACEs, trauma, spirituality, deconstruction, self, marriage, family systems, reparenting, Christian
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Be a guest on Class with Kate!

Apply to be a guest on Kate’s podcast. Guests are always anonymous.

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Join the waitlist for coaching with Kate!

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Books, podcasts, coaches, content creators, authors and organizations

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